My uncle passed away last week. Although we didn’t have the closest relationship, he was still an important part of my life, especially growing up. At his viewing, I was reminded of when I was a child and we stayed with my aunt and uncle in Wild Dunes. Having moved from New Jersey in September of the previous year, I was having a hard time adjusting to life in the South.
My uncle had a way of making everyone feel at ease. He was fun to be around and was always cracking jokes. He was also a lover of all things South Carolina. Whether it was Clemson football, golf, Charleston or the beach, he was proud to introduce us to southern traditions. This included the food. It was in their condo where I first ate Frogmore stew. With each bite of shrimp, corn, potato and sausage, I began to embrace everything my newfound home had to offer.
To this day, I can’t smell Old Bay without thinking of my Uncle and that childhood memory.
Our senses evoke strong emotions. The smell of grass or grilled hot dogs and hamburgers smells like summer while fresh cut flowers may remind us of Springtime. On the other side of the coin, there’s a reason so many soldiers struggle with PTSD upon their return home. The sights, smells, sounds, taste and feel of war are hard to overcome. Senses are powerful forces of nature that we should both enjoy and respect.
Recently, my wife and I spent the weekend in Beaufort. We got married there and have been back countless times in the 14 years since. As we were walking around a neighborhood outside downtown, the aroma of jasmine filled the air. Jasmine is particularly pungent, with a smell radius of roughly 20 feet in any direction. Personally, I love it. As the smell fills my nostrils, my mind races back to the day we were married. I’m always amazed that a common vine can provide such deep feelings.
Our ability to listen can also be quite incredible. Something tells me I’m not the only one who’s had a breakup song. A breakup, especially when we’re younger and our emotions are relatively unformed, can be incredibly difficult. Allowing a gifted artist to carry the burden of your heartbreak is comforting. For me, it was Jeff Buckley and his song, “Last Goodbye.” His melodic voice and poetic lyrics perfectly captured how I felt at the time. Thankfully, twenty five years has removed any lovelorn sting. It’s now just a great song I can listen to and enjoy without any negative attachment.
One of the greatest gifts is a hug from your mother, your child or significant other. Last night, my ten year old daughter hugged me before going to bed. Rather than letting go, she held on tighter and whispered in my ear how much she loved me. As I hugged her back, it was impossible for me not to think of my 80 year old self looking back on that moment. Similar to the smell of Old Bay, I’ll be reminded of her embrace whenever anyone gives me a hug that’s a little tighter than usual. It’s forever embedded in my brain, imparting a level of happiness I never thought possible.
The senses that we possess provide us with an incredible gift that most of us take for granted. The ability to see waves crashing on the beach, hear your child speak or hug your loved one are free and available to a majority of us everyday. No amount of money can replace a kind word when you’re feeling depressed, a perfectly cooked apple pie or the feel of a baseball hitting your glove as your Dad smiles.
Shhh. Can you hear that? Open the window wider.
It’s Spring and the birds are in full throat.
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