The seeds of despair that we experience in life don’t just go away. Thankfully, the same can be said for moments of pure joy; however, somehow the ugly parts tend to scar a bit deeper. If this is altogether depressing, it shouldn’t be. Consider it a part of life. Similar to death and taxes, our emotions are unavoidable, so it’s best to embrace both the good and the bad parts that present themselves.
Those little despair seedlings can be especially useful when it comes to our relationship with money. I’m sure you’ve heard of more than one person who grew up in poverty and vowed never to let that happen to them or their family. This fear of being poor provides an overwhelming drive to succeed. Many of the most successful sales people, leaders and trend setters were once rattling around town peddling a rickety bicycle with weather worn shoes.
Fear of poverty is a great motivator. The opposite can be said for those who have zero fear of where their next meal may present itself.
Lobster, crab and steak are universally accepted as luxury foods. The same goes for high end champagne paired with caviar or freshly shucked oysters sitting atop crushed ice. With exception to caviar, I’ve had the great fortune to indulge in all of these items more than once in my life. Not everyday of course, only on special occasions. The key word here is “special.”
What if it wasn’t special to have the best of everything everyday of your life? Would anything be worth having if you had anything you wanted all the time? It’s a philosophical question for sure but, in my mind, it’s also pretty simple to answer.
The answer is no. If you could have everything you wanted whenever you wanted it nothing would have any value whatsoever. The most expensive diamond may as well be a cubic zirconia, a luxury car would be equivalent to a Honda Accord and a high priced steak would equate to a fast food hamburger. Similar to a drug addict, nothing would satiate your hunger for something new and exciting. You’d essentially be living in your own personal hell where nothing satisfies your thirst for more.
Everyone grows up wanting to be rich and have everything but what is everything? How much would you pay for the ability to be free of stress and worry? I can assure you, even extremely wealthy people have stress. They may not worry about how to pay the electric bill or buy a gift for their child on their birthday but the worry is there nonetheless.
Finding a balance between what matters and what doesn’t will ultimately provide the happiness you seek. That balance has very little to do with how much money is in your bank account, the house you live in or the car you drive. If you grew up poor or in a home where you had to do without, lean into that feeling of despair you’ve been attempting to avoid. Try to have a healthy relationship with money rather than allowing it to become a false idol that should be worshipped and all encompassing.
Besides, I’ve heard that caviar isn’t all that great and even if it is, I’m not going to spend one minute of my life in despair for not having tried it.
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